So how is my Veterans Day Essay coming along?

So how is my Veterans Day Essay coming along?
Okay this is the start I still need 54 more words so please i need some editing and more words!!

Today is Veterans Day, the day we celebrate all people who have severed in a war. It wasn’t always called Veterans Day though, November 11, became known as Armistice Day in 1926. Twelve years later on June 1, 1954 the holiday became Veterans Day. We should all be thankful for the people who have helped fight for our freedom. My grandpa is a veteran, and he fought in World War II, but it doesn’t really matter if you know a veteran or not, they should be thanked, because they put their lives in danger for us. I know some people probably don’t know what a veteran is, but most people would say a veteran is a person who has fought in a war, but there more than that. They’re the people are brave enough to go to war, and who made us safe. There the people who never lost hope and never gave up. We could never understand what they went through, unless we were at battlefront. These few brave people don’t usually get the thanks that they really deserve, but this is a good year to start giving them the real thanks that they deserve.

It sounded good. When I read it though it sounded to soft in my head. Try to make the beginning more bold and dramatic. Make it sound strong like our veterans hearts are! Use more interesting words, make it sparkle when you read it. Writing isnt just a hobby or an assignment its an art thats been handed down from generation to generation. Remember that when you finish writing it. But also remember that it really should sound strong and proud just like our veterans. With this topic it would sound better if it was written like you were giving a speech. Reach out to people with your words of how great our veterans are!
Hope i helped!