What are some things I can add to make this a successful essay?

What are some things I can add to make this a successful essay?
What if you were told that two plus two was five? Would you believe it? Or what if you were conditioned to believe that “everyone belongs to everyone else?” would you believe it? Of course you wouldn’t but the citizens living in totalitarian societies such as those in Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World and George Orwell’s 1984 would probably believe it because the governments use the help of technology to remove the citizens’ ability to think for themselves.

In this essay, Im trying to write about the use of technology in these novels and the impact it has on the citizens. With that being said, I also need to add the technology in todays life and the impact…Please help me if you have read these novels.

Well i would definately talk about exactly what totalitarian societies believe, even define it and tell why you think the people in the books are totalitarian and then show how technology is used to ensure that the citizens adhere to socitital norms, are dependant on tech, etc. As far as today I would talk about things like cell phones (texting in particular), email- people in offices rarely talk anymore, and of course good ol’ tv and how it influences beliefs…fopr example how the news shows mostly all the shock value news during air time and on its commercials to get you to tune in creating a sense of fear so that you have to tune in and you are arfraid of your own shadow (i dont have this problem all lights are off)- good luck and do your homework. hope this is not due tomorrow